So today i did something i have not done in a year. i went to church. it seems like for the past 3 years i only go to church in March. not sure why but this year it's going to be different. i am really am going to try to go every sunday to get spiritually fed. two weeks ago i was getting a strong urge to go to church. i think it's because i miss it. i wanted to go last sunday but slept through my alarm. this sunday my friend Shelice was giving a talk and i made every effort to go and listen ... even if it means going on two hours of sleep.
shelice's talk was awesome and there was a part that really stuck out and felt like it was meant for me. at the end of her talk she was reading a testimony by Elder Holland and he said:
"To all of you who think you are lost or without hope, or who think you have done too much that was too wrong for too long, to every one of you who worry that you are stranded somewhere on the wintry plains of life and have wrecked your handcart in the process, this conference calls out Jehovah’s unrelenting refrain, “[My] hand is stretched out still. I shall lengthen out mine arm unto them,” He said, “[and even if they] deny me; nevertheless, I will be merciful unto them, … if they will repent and come unto me; for mine arm is lengthened out all the day long, saith the Lord God of Hosts. His mercy endureth forever, and His hand is stretched out still. His is the pure love of Christ, the charity that never faileth, that compassion which endures even when all other strength disappears."
Lately i've been feeling lost and that my life has no direction. i feel stuck. i don't know if any of you have ever felt that way ... stuck. and i think i have disappointed people because i might have done wrong (according to the church). today people came to me and asked if i was new and it was hard to answer ... "yes um no um maybe. i've been in the ward for a year and am just now coming" but i guess it really doesn't matter what the answer is ... i came and making a decision to come back to church. that is what really matters. but i also am not sure if i can follow all the teachings as before but it could all change ... no guarantees though.
Before i close i must say ... this album is AWESOME!!!